Know Thyself, Self-esteem, Self-respect, Self-confidence.
"Know Thyself",
said a Greek Philosopher (inscribed on the temple of Apollo at Delphi
and usually attributed to Socrates).
But what does that
mean and how is it attainable? Socrates was probably not the first
and not the last teacher of philosopher to consider it
important.
According to scriptures, many great Masters
said the same, maybe their translated word different but the
same.
Jesus Christ instructed his apostles to "Put
first the Kingdom of Heaven" and the"The Kingdom is
Within"/ Buddha told his followers to look within and find
enlightenment. Nowadays many teachers to to inspire people to search
within themselves, whether through prayer, meditation or even
drugs.
When I hear a person read aloud a poem, a piece
from a book, make a speech or sing a song, obviously I want to hear
it. It requires a degree of self-confidence, self-esteem and
self-respect, which come too with self-knowledge. It's not so much
about whether the listener laughs or cries, but that they can hear.
And after all, not everyone likes or appreciates every "performer",
but the joy for the performer should come with the performance,
knowing that one is heard. Or am I wrong and what people think of
one is what it should be all about? Is success just about what the
world thinks of us? For me, no. It is about what I think of myself,
not in an egotistical way, but in a way that brings contentment.
Yet
many who have written great words or songs - well - they "mumble".
I always advise people to look up and speak or sing loud enough, if without amplification, as if speaking to the person at the back of the room - without shouting! And if playing, for example, a guitar or piano, I want to hear the words above but along with the tune.
Confidence
comes with practice.
I was quite shy as a teenager,
especially speaking in public. Even, still somewhat shy is making
first approach or contact with one person or small group. If
planning to speak, worrying in advance about what to say does not
help (writing it down or making bullet points does, so long as we
look up when reading or speaking).
Even at University in a
tutorial, when the Tutor asked a question and I knew the answer, knew
i was correct, i would remain silent even if the other half dozen
students did the same!
I remember watching a TV interview
of Cliff Richard (remember him? Now Sir Cliff). He was asked how he
managed to sing when ins hall with literally hundreds of screaming
teenage girls (as was common at that time with many pop stars). He
probably couldn't hear himself, most of the audience couldn't either,
with a backing band, The Shadow, despite amplification. So it
probably didn't matter what the words and what his voice actually
sounded like on stage.
His reply was basically he didn't
sing to hundred of girts, he just looked at one and sang to her; then
looked at another and same to her (or maybe even him). He certainly
came across as confident.
So when my time came that i
wanted or felt the need to speak to an audience, I employed his
technique. And it helped if I had a plant in one of the front rows,
somebody i chew that i could look at and who would react, nod, smile
or laugh and this encourage me. But it was really all about what was
going on inside my head and my feelings.
I read a book
called "Feel the fear and Do it Anyway" and that helped
too. What did it matter if people disagreed with what I said, even
laughed at me? The book explained that most "stars" feel
nervous but are able to employ that energy to their benefit.
After
all, we are all the same in what counts. Same bodily parts (mostly)
same hearts, same blood, same mouths, tongues, brains. Just a little
difference in what society likes to call IQ or educational level. We
all smiles the same, cry the same, basically. So why should one
person feel better or worse than another? We were all born, we all
live, we all die, irrespective of wealth, fame, strength, glory or
achievement. What are real aim should be is to feel peace, joy,
love, contentment within ourselves! What are the obstacles to that?
Doubt, confusion, fear, feelings of inadequacy, incompetence,
over-dependence - those feelings that the world so often seems to
want to put on us. There are more losers in the race than winners.
People are singled out for awards and recognition.
What
needs to be encouraged, on the contrary, is certainty (knowledge),
clarity, equity, self-confidence in independence, self-esteem - that
is self-knowledge. Know thyself!
All that is within, the
good and the bad, within each one of us, to be sought and found.
"We
need to know the difference between what is pleasant and what is
good" (Prem Rawat)
Most of us spend our time seeking
what is pleasant and often that is not so good for us!
So
to sum up, how to make those changes? We need to find somebody that
can show us how, beyond words, religion or philosophy, to look within
and find our true Nature, our soul, our spirit, our "God"
our Self.
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